I have a friend who got kicked out of the airport very recently. Wow, that is a very complete sentence in itself, and it has everything, fact,suspense and absurdity. Fact being, he actually did get kicked out, what a douche! Suspense is the fact that I didnot disclose the name and why this happened in the first place, he's still such a douche! And finally the absurdity because, who the fuck gets kicked out (not allowed to board) of an airport except a terrorist or a douche! ....Hence proved, Sami Shaikh is such a douche! Haha!
Getting back to civilization, weren't airports and aeroplanes invented to make our lives simpler? But all I associate with my flyer hours is extreme discomfort.
Discomforts can be the following :
1. Too many procedures.
2. Good looking Air-hostesses.
3. Climate/ weather.
4. Co-Passengers
1. Too Many Procedures
Right from the part where you ahve to prove that you actually have a ticket to an airplane that leaves this airport, at the entrance; to the check-in to the final boarding, these tasks suck, especially at Indian airports. Sami got kicked out because he did not have an ECNR stamped on his passport ( he's still such a douche!). I mean why cant it be a simple procedure, why does everyone need to be petrified of the procedures? Sami (Yes! The Douche!) says it was so embarrassing for him to get denied to board the plane, I can totally sympathize, since I've been there once too, the same situation actually! And I must say, it truly was embarrassing since I was with my family and I was the only one not allowed to board. But I somehow tackled that experience with utmost poise and ease. (Read as, I was so fucking scared that I almost shit my pants.)
Then occassionally you meet the first timers who do not know shit about where to go for check-in, which gate to board from and how to fill those never ending forms!
I hate being 3 hours early to a flight, what a waste of valuable time!
2. Good Looking Airhostesses
Now everyone is wondering how can this ever be a discomfort! Well try flying with your father or your girlfriend/s once. You'll know what am talking about.
Well I happen to be a very cool passenger, the model flyer, I like talking it up to an airhostess in between flights, especially when it's a long flight. And this is the exact nature of mine that causes problems.
I leave the rest upto you to imagine.
3. Climate/ Weather
Omg! I hate those moments on the plane, the dives and sudden change in cabin pressure, fucks the shit out of most people, doesnot scare me much, I like the kick and the sudden rush of blood to the head.
Now you are wondering why is that if I am not scared, why the fuck would I hate it? There was this one time when I was on a flight where the cabin pressure dropped suddenly and all those masks came hanging out, I had this lady sitting beside me, I mean she was good looking n all, but when a lady sinks her nails into your hand when she clutches it and doesnot leave it for more that 20 minutes, it's the end of the world my friend. You can kiss your hard ass public image of a tough guy Godd-Bye! I mean Girl atleast ask me out first, before you start slandering my public image, so that atleast I can tag you as my girl-friend, and then everyone would understand. She started crying immediately as the fiasco started, and I started crying after 10 minutes with fucking pain! But tears nevertheless. :| :(
4. Co-passengers
Do i even need to elaborate this one? Imagine Farts, Odours, trying to search for gold in the nostrils, too nosy in other people's businesses, Farts, Odours, Fat people, Nuns, handicapped people and finally School Teachers.
I had a lot of piercings till a while back, and the worst part is when I got seated beside a Nun/ School Teacher. Pain! Its like they wanted to baptize me/ tutor me into the the good ways of Jesus/ Education. What a bust! :|
They would go on and on about how I should mend my ways, and I would be like if this bitch does not stop, I might just baptize her too, in my own 'holy' ways. *winks*
Well, these were just a summary of my experiences. Sami, I am compassionate, but dude! You got kicked out of a fucking airport! What a fucking Loser! :P
Getting back to civilization, weren't airports and aeroplanes invented to make our lives simpler? But all I associate with my flyer hours is extreme discomfort.
Discomforts can be the following :
1. Too many procedures.
2. Good looking Air-hostesses.
3. Climate/ weather.
4. Co-Passengers
1. Too Many Procedures
Right from the part where you ahve to prove that you actually have a ticket to an airplane that leaves this airport, at the entrance; to the check-in to the final boarding, these tasks suck, especially at Indian airports. Sami got kicked out because he did not have an ECNR stamped on his passport ( he's still such a douche!). I mean why cant it be a simple procedure, why does everyone need to be petrified of the procedures? Sami (Yes! The Douche!) says it was so embarrassing for him to get denied to board the plane, I can totally sympathize, since I've been there once too, the same situation actually! And I must say, it truly was embarrassing since I was with my family and I was the only one not allowed to board. But I somehow tackled that experience with utmost poise and ease. (Read as, I was so fucking scared that I almost shit my pants.)
Then occassionally you meet the first timers who do not know shit about where to go for check-in, which gate to board from and how to fill those never ending forms!
I hate being 3 hours early to a flight, what a waste of valuable time!
2. Good Looking Airhostesses
Now everyone is wondering how can this ever be a discomfort! Well try flying with your father or your girlfriend/s once. You'll know what am talking about.
Well I happen to be a very cool passenger, the model flyer, I like talking it up to an airhostess in between flights, especially when it's a long flight. And this is the exact nature of mine that causes problems.
I leave the rest upto you to imagine.
3. Climate/ Weather
Omg! I hate those moments on the plane, the dives and sudden change in cabin pressure, fucks the shit out of most people, doesnot scare me much, I like the kick and the sudden rush of blood to the head.
Now you are wondering why is that if I am not scared, why the fuck would I hate it? There was this one time when I was on a flight where the cabin pressure dropped suddenly and all those masks came hanging out, I had this lady sitting beside me, I mean she was good looking n all, but when a lady sinks her nails into your hand when she clutches it and doesnot leave it for more that 20 minutes, it's the end of the world my friend. You can kiss your hard ass public image of a tough guy Godd-Bye! I mean Girl atleast ask me out first, before you start slandering my public image, so that atleast I can tag you as my girl-friend, and then everyone would understand. She started crying immediately as the fiasco started, and I started crying after 10 minutes with fucking pain! But tears nevertheless. :| :(
4. Co-passengers
Do i even need to elaborate this one? Imagine Farts, Odours, trying to search for gold in the nostrils, too nosy in other people's businesses, Farts, Odours, Fat people, Nuns, handicapped people and finally School Teachers.
I had a lot of piercings till a while back, and the worst part is when I got seated beside a Nun/ School Teacher. Pain! Its like they wanted to baptize me/ tutor me into the the good ways of Jesus/ Education. What a bust! :|
They would go on and on about how I should mend my ways, and I would be like if this bitch does not stop, I might just baptize her too, in my own 'holy' ways. *winks*
Well, these were just a summary of my experiences. Sami, I am compassionate, but dude! You got kicked out of a fucking airport! What a fucking Loser! :P
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